Violin practice & my inner gremlin

One and half hours after practicing my violin, my upper arms, wrist, and fingers are aching! Yet, here I am typing. The battle between me and my inner gremlin rages on. My inner gremlin, knowing my weakness of perfection, is attacking me once again. My "natural" self tells me that I'm progressing nicely for a beginner; however, that inner gremlin is causing all kinds of chaos and inner conflict. Constant doubt and the desire to give up ("I'll never get this!") are my new best friends. I've been watching all the very talented violinists on youtube and compare myself. Here I am practicing and rating myself as a failure next to these talents. My inner gremlin is, once again, sabotaging my efforts to learn something new by comparing me to those who have been studying for years! "Of course I wouldn't compare!" my natural self declares. "I am only a mere student taking one step at a time. It makes sense that I can't play well yet - not with only two lessons!" What a battle raging inside me between that dastardly gremlin and my natural vibrant self. However, today I prevail. Bye bye ugly little gremlin! I'm off to practice once again! Today my inner gremlin is defeated!

New to the Game

Hey everyone! I thought I'd jump on the band-wagon and start blogging just like most of my friends. I hope I don't disappoint, however, I will put out the disclaimer: I'm not trying to be witty, inspirational, nor over the top insightful. I am just a woman trying to figure out myself in a life of complexity. I am ready, though, to put some of my thoughts and struggles out in the world in a public way. I'm aiming more for catharsis and self-reflection as opposed to publication, but if anyone is amused or enlightened along the way, then more power to the both of us!